428

428.

I can't possibly keep up with the death count on my blog, because I don't post nearly enough, but the latest is 428 (according to the director of Ambulance and Emergency Services in Gaza).
Every time I leave the house, I rush back to check...
Why? Is it so important to know the number? Is Israel worse because they killed 428 than they were when they had killed 400? ...I don't know what it is, though, but I need to check. Scroll through the pictures. Look at images of people whose heads and limbs have been shot off. Cry.
But that isn't helpful, is it? What does it do for me to cry?
So then I think, "I should pray."
Then I think, "So many people are already praying. Would it really matter if there were one more?"
Then I think, "I just need to go to the protest."
Then I think, "What does that do? Neither Israel nor the United States cares much about the opinions of 'the People.'"
I think of many things, and then I think how they won't help.
Then I think that this is exactly what Israel wants: to break the resistance in every way. To shatter our hope and make us afraid.
I don't want to let that happen.
Just now, I scanned the internet for profiles of some of the individuals killed. I could not find any. If anyone knows where to find this, please let me know.